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Flavor of the Week. We watch Call for Help and we love Chris Pirillo and I'm not just saying that because he has a popular blog and someone I like is friendly with him. We really do love him. Like family. Oh god, we are so pathetic. We are just pathetic geeks.[Everybody loves geeks. Especially other geeks. You're all my homelies. And yes, I meant to type that.]

Google is decentralizing. It's hardware and software, totally turnkey, configured through a Web browser, it does for local information what the centralized Google does for the World Wide Web. [I'm getting google-eyed just thinking about it. Could be the second cup of coffee talking.]

Intel unveils processors for handheld gadgets. The Intel PXA250 and PXA210 processors will allow improved music, movies and games on next-generation gadgets, which are expected to be popular as wireless networks are upgraded in coming months. [Now, if only we could convince the world that the PalmOS is going nowhere.]

Dot.comeuppance. At lunch time, you looked for a holiday bargain, checked the sports results and posted a few messages on a website discussion board. A day like any other - but this time it could end up with you being fired. [Hey, has anybody seen my red stapler? I had my red stapler here. It was right here.]

Battling Bush's digital divide. The Leadership Conference on Civil Rights (LCCR), the Leadership Conference Education Fund (LCEF), and the Benton Foundation will meet in Washington on Tuesday. [Not to be confused with the People's Front of Judea.]

Robocop's fall from grace. His method was to make life tough for known criminals and mount surveillance operations until they were caught in the act. [You're under a... *clap clap* ... *clap clap* arrest. Please don't do that.]

Lab Develops Artificial Womb. Embroys successfully attached themselves to the walls of these wombs and began to grow but were terminated to comply with regulations. [I don't know whether to laugh or cry.]

Critical IE6.0 Update. Download now to protect your computer from these vulnerabilities, the most serious of which could allow an attacker to run code on your computer. [ActiveWin[That's it. I'm going back to the C64.]

Chris Pirillo, Look Out. I started thinking “TechTV needs a kids show!” Then I realized that kids pick up this stuff faster then adults, and after watching the Call for Help episode from earlier this week about the wireless networks he already understands how ours works.[He probably could have done a better job than me today. I need to wake up.]

TechTV's for Geeks. Now I'm not ashamed to admit it (clearly), but these shows are for nerds only. The main hosts of each show, Chris Pirillo and Leo Laporte are themselves uber-dorks.[We're the wonder twins. Shape of - a car bra! I have no idea what that means. I'm just making it up as I go along.]

Space: The Final Tourist Trap. Last year a millionaire named Dennis Tito plunked down nearly $20 million and opened the portals of space to tourism. Now there's a second paying passenger ready to take that heady ride. [And I say: let Carrot Top go if he really wants to go. Any arguments?]

Revolutionary X3 sensor. Foveon has today announced a new, revolutionary image sensor called the X3. A traditional digital camera sensor works by capturing just one colour (red, green or blue) at each pixel… [And just when I was getting used to my Canon PowerShot G2. Oh well.]

What Now for Rambus? Could the computer memory technology company still be an attractive investment? [Who cares. They screwed themselves out of the market.]

Free Comic Book Day. On Saturday, May 4th – the day after the premiere of the Spider-Man movie! – the comic book industry will sponsor Free Comic Book Day at participating comic book shops. Publishers such as Dark Horse, DC, Image, Marvel, and many more are preparing giveaway editions of some of their best titles for this special day.[I see we are not familiar with sarcasm.]

Microsoft pushes users to Office XP. Tech Pacific marketing manager Scott Cowan says the distributor has stopped taking orders for Office 2000 as the product is no longer available. [Give eBay or Half.com a shot. That's how I met Gretchen. And yes, all sales were final. Further proof that people will buy anything.]

Serious Lego. Laser pointers were on sale at Office Depot ($8.99 a pop, as I recall) so I thought I'd get a couple and make my RCX respond to them. Turns out it's really difficult. [Mom! The lego made me blinded!]

The role of the command line in the modern GUI. Not a particularly new innovation, in the last ten to twenty years the command line has seen its role steadily decrease - losing in a big way to the modern graphical user interface (GUI). [Waiter, there's a GUI in my CLI. Could I please get a refund?]

AOL blocks users from forwarding. I was informed that AOL has recently changed their Mail relay service so you can no longer forward to AOL accounts from thier mail server. There is no bounce message, or undeliverable mail message, the mail just seems to disappear. [If we own you and you know it, clap your hands.]

Rediscover the Joy of Coloring. I'm not talking about coloring your outfit, makeup, or anything fashion-related. This is color as in those coloring books you had as a kid. a day late and a… [Dollar Short? Sorry, but that blog belongs to Mena.]

Symantec Security. If this software had a mother, it would demand photo ID on every visit. [How's that for a mental image? Considering 99% of Symantec software is crap.]

Swedish: The Open Source language? As reported by Gnuheter, it seems like Swedish is becoming the official open source language. Here are some recent developments on this matter. [It's bork bork borkalicious!]

Top-Ten viruses in January. Badtrans.B, Sircam and Nimda head the list of viruses eliminated by Panda SoftwareÂ’s free, online antivirus. [That's it. I'm going back to Fidonet.]

Episode II Character Details. Rebelscum has posted scans of all the card backs, so you can read the text for yourself. But beware, spoilers are present! [Is it just me, or do the new Clonetroopers look a little too cool?]

Am I annoying or not? Get your own back at AmIAnnoyingorNot.com, and pass judgement on more than 3,000 (so far) people or groups in the public eye. You can vote on whether celebrities are annoying or not. [Please don't pick me. Please don't pick me. Please don't pick me.]

Thin Mints in Cyberspace. E-mail is playing a bigger role than ever in the annual U.S. Girl Scout cookie-selling season. But scout leaders remain opposed to pitching their sugary fare on the Web. [Where's Raymond when you need him? Everybody loves that guy.]

Laptops keep PC sales afloat. Because of strong holiday purchases, the number of notebooks sold grew 21.5 percent year over year during the fourth quarter of 2001 and 7.9 percent for the entire year. [If only we could get the units to shrink by 21.5 percent.]

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