TSA: Transportation Security Administration?
So, I’m passing through the security checkpoint at the mouse fart of an airport in San Jose, CA (coming back from a rather remarkable Under the Radar event)… TSA tells me that my carry-on bag would need to be inspected. I was a bit puzzled, but not shocked – as I decided to store all my electronics in the mini-whale and not check it at the ticket counter.
He tells me that I’m carrying liquid. I was?
I normally check my luggage, so I completely forgot about the small tube of toothpaste (which cost me $47.99 at the hotel mini-bar – a bargain at any price), my lip balm, and my freakin’ can of freakin’ antiperspirant / deodorant. What the freak? Are they freakin’ serious? Yeah, I know – these things should have been in a baggie, but…
Okay. This is how we stop terrorists. Seriously?
I’m just going to check my bag next time, as I should have done tonight (in the first place). The ten minutes I save by not having to wait for baggage to come around on the carousel is simply not worth the hassle of having to chuck products that could apparently take down an entire plane.
And to the guy who was unfortunate enough to sit next to me on the flight, I deeply apologize for all the garlic farts – Brandon was the one who suggested the Macaroni Grill for dinner. I would have popped a few butt mints (great idea – someone needs to fund it) but they were confiscated along with my collection of rare Commemorative Abe Vigoda snow globes (too much liquid, had to abandon at checkpoint).
I come home from the airport, unpack my suitcase, and guess what I find lying underneath all my dirty clothes? A pair of extremely sharp scissors.
I shit you not.
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8 Comments
The Chris Pirillo Show
November 22nd, 2009
at 1:21am
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Justin Yost
June 29th, 2007
at 8:01pm
That’s ok, I have almost always walked through security with a knife (half serrated and half straight edge blade approx. 3 inches in length) through security, at Pittsburgh, Dallas/Fort Worth, Detroit, and several other smaller airports. Why, because I forget about it just about every time, never needed to get rid of before 9/11 and now I just don’t think about it because I carry it everywhere. That bad thing is that it always goes through the x-ray machine, the TSA personnel have never noticed it. The only time I ever got pulled over for extra screening was when I was wearing pants with a button fly and it triggered the metal detector. I was skeptical that could have triggered it, but they (the TSA) said they had received a warning of something happening and had raised the sensitivity on the metal detector. So there you go TSA way to stop real weapons.
Sam
June 30th, 2007
at 7:03am
On my way home I found my pocket knife in my pocket. Rats. Hate to loose it. Tossed it into the xray bin with my shoes. Wait! It was in my pocket when went thru the check leaving home! I grabbed it back and stuffed it back into my pocket and then looked around furtively. Now “armed” I walked thru the scanner without being stopped and managed to keep my knife twice.
Sam
June 30th, 2007
at 7:06am
BTW, have you noticed that some passengers, like first class, get expedited treatment in shorter lines at the TSA check? WTF is that about? TSA is a taxpayer funded government agency. Why are they giving special privileges to private citizens who happen to be richer? Isn’t OUR government supposed to be egalitarian?
Jeff Barr
June 30th, 2007
at 8:37am
Scissors are not prohibited on flights as long as they’re not above a certain size. At one time they were, but as time has progressed, the TSA has continually re-evaluated what items are on the “not allowed” list and modified it accordingly. Upon the airlines installing locking reinforced cockpit doors, an “attack” by a small pair of scissors, no matter how sharp, really doesn’t present a security issue.
On the other hand, a small amount of liquid can bring down an entire plane (Google Ramzi Yousef, convicted in the 1993 WTC bombings). Yousef tried a test run on a Philippine Airlines flight in 1994, but used too little liquid, and only killed the person whose seatback the bomb was placed in. The bomb was assembled in the lavatory from everyday items which can easily be gotten through ANY security, hence the prohibition on large amounts of liquid in carry-on items.
The funny thing is the TSA had been aware of this possibility from its inception, but didn’t do anything about it until a potential plot involving it and a BA flight were uncovered.
Jim
July 3rd, 2007
at 6:08pm
To Sam, Not to worry about your taxes funding special treatment for First Class or frequent flyer passengers. The airlines fund the TSA resources required for those expedited lines.
John
July 8th, 2007
at 8:35am
Jim,
To say that the ‘airlines fund’ anything only looks at the first half of the issue. The airlines don’t do anything altruistic. They pass the charges on to us. So, no doubt the passenger is paying for it; hopefully only the passenger getting the benefit, and it’s not being spread among all the passengers on the plane, since they don’t all benefit from it..
Chris,
You could just drop those ‘dangerous’ items into an envelope at the hotel and mail them home, so that at least they’re not wasted, or taken home and used by the TSA droid. (Perks of the job, dontchaknow) Heck, maybe UPS or FedEx should institute another service just to ship baggage. Either of them have a better on-time and proper location delivery record than any of the airlines.
All the krap that the flying public is put through is just for show. It does almost diddly to actually increase our safety. El-Al doesn’t play those games with all passengers, and they don’t have the problems that we do. They look at ‘the other end’ of the equation. We could/should take lessons from them. It’s kinda hard to tell a winner how to play.. But instead, we play games with the entire flying public to the point where the ‘fix’ is worse than the problem.. Geez-o-Pete!
Medicineweight.com
September 10th, 2008
at 5:24am
you noticed that some passengers, like first class, get expedited treatment in shorter lines at the TSA check? WTF is that about? TSA is a taxpayer funded government agency. Why are they giving special privileges to private citizens who happen to be richer? Isn’t OUR government supposed to be egalitarian?