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Top 10 Sexy UNIX Commands
- date
- unzip
- touch
- strip
- finger
- mount
- gasp
- yes
- top
- man
- uptime
- nice
Okay, so that’s more than 10. Am I missing any? Got any good command combos? [Thanks to Bethany for the core dump.]
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15 Comments
pablasso
July 21st, 2009
at 9:32am
http://jamiedubs.com/fuckflickr/data/Old-meme.jpg
Philly
July 21st, 2009
at 9:33am
Actually, I think “finger” is the best, since you have to supply the name, too. Using it on my girlfriend’s account:
$ finger sophi
Alex Tsui
July 21st, 2009
at 9:36am
Ahahahah, now you have to admit, that is hilarious! I never thought that UNIX commands could be so dirty! xD
hemanth.hm
July 21st, 2009
at 9:42am
Had got a mail with something similar.
Here are few unix error msgs ,from GNU {From: ttt@ottawa (Tom Thomassen)}
(% represents the csh, $ represents the bourne shell)
% “How poorly would you rate the Unix (so-called) user interface?
Unmatched “.
% rm congressional-ethics
rm: congressional-ethics nonexistent
% ar m God
ar: God does not exist
% [Where is Jimmy Hoffa?
Missing ].
% ^How did the sex change^ operation go?
Modifier failed.
% If I had a ( for every $ Congress spent, what would I have?
Too many (’s.
%make love
Make: Don’t know how to make love. Stop.
% sleep with me
bad character
% got a light?
No match.
% man: why did you get a divorce?
man:: Too many arguments.
% ^What is saccharine?
Bad substitute.
% \(-
(-: Command not found.
% sh
$ PATH=pretending! /usr/ucb/which sense
no sense in pretending
$ drink matter
matter: cannot create
Or, in a System V (att) universe:
$ cat “can of food”
cat: cannot open can of food
Dave
July 21st, 2009
at 9:43am
Log In
Jeff Schiller
July 21st, 2009
at 9:49am
How can you have missed ‘fsck’ ?
James
July 21st, 2009
at 9:57am
How could you leave off head.
Bob Wolff
July 21st, 2009
at 10:09am
tail
mount and umount
service
shorewall
dansguardian
Joe
July 21st, 2009
at 10:12am
fsck .. I can’t believe you forgot that one
Kawazoe Masahiro
July 21st, 2009
at 11:00am
And that’s why I always use the console on my computer ;-)
Bethany
July 21st, 2009
at 11:11am
You’re welcome! Sexy UNIX commands are a riot!
Matthew Willison
July 21st, 2009
at 6:19pm
This is so true, I don’t know how many commands I’ve seen with this kind of stuff on it, but it makes me laugh every time
Masoud Gheysari M
July 23rd, 2009
at 12:57am
You have forgotten fsck! (if you can ignore the change of one letter!)
Adrian
July 26th, 2009
at 11:36pm
man command is the best.
David
September 1st, 2009
at 3:43am
What about cowsay? Isn’t that everyone’s sexual fantasy?