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US elections are always close, but the nation was shocked to see John McCamin defeat Barack Obama by a single vote. The single non-voter who is responsible for this defeat is now a pariah, simply for oversleeping.

The man who would have made the deciding vote was too lazy to get out of bed to do so. Americans are outraged, and people in other countries apparently fear for the lives of their goats. How can this man look in the mirror each day? How can he live with himself after what he has done to the nation?

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McCain Defeats Obama

In response to Jeff’s Advice for McCain (which, itself, was a response):

Maybe John McCain is going for the nerd vote with this commercial’s (as you put it) “Star Wars” production values? When you have Darth Vader in your video, it’s almost guaranteed to go viral. Upon watching this particular McCain political ad, I felt compelled to hop into my Landspeeder, float down to the local cantina, and down a few rounds of Jawa Juice with friends.

I used to bullseye womprats in my T-16 back home (Iowa), and that couldn’t have taken any longer than McCain’s video. Personally, I think it’s more reminicent of THX 1138. Then again, I also think that Hilary Clinton looks a lot like Figrin D’an (a Bith) and Barack Obama is totally a Lando Calrissian wannabe.

Maybe it’s just me, but I believe that Jabba the Hutt would make an amazing candidate in this election. Too bad the “Gangsta” party hasn’t been formally recognized yet. You might as well vote for Greedo, the “True Green” candidate – and even then, you’re throwing your vote into the trash compactor.

Is it just me, or does Jeff Jarvis look an awful lot like Obi-Wan Kenobi?

The Politics of Star Wars