Tag Archives: iTouch

Why Should You Buy an iPod shuffle?


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Why the hell are people still buying iPod shuffles, anyway? If anything, the new iPod nano should replace all use cases for an iPod shuffle – minus price, which is relatively negligible. I’m not kidding when I ask why anyone is using them, folks. Take a good look at all of the new iPod models, and tell me WHY someone would feel the need to buy this particular device.

Sure, they’re only about fifty bucks. And yes, they come in several cute colors. Whoa… you can even put a couple of songs on one of these babies and clip it to your belt. Oh, wait! You can get it engraved! Perhaps I was a bit hasty in my judgment.

Nah.

In the age of the touch screen, who would want click controls? The only function I can find on the official Apple Store page beyond playing music is having an annoying pre-recorded voice announce the title or artist of the song you’re listening to… in any of 25 languages.

If you’re going to spend money for a music player, save some extra pennies and choose the nano instead.

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Please Call It the iPod Touch

Look, I’m a tolerant man. When Pixie wakes me up and asks for a trip to the little doggy’s room at 3am, I don’t yell at her. If Wicket throws up on my MacBook Pro, I forgive him. Eventually.

But seriously, I am out of forgiveness for people who can’t figure out the name of Apple’s iPod Touch.

According to the Apple press event yesterday, it’s the most popular iPod and the #1 game player in the world. It’s been used for over 1.5 billion game and entertainment downloads. It’s cute. It’s thin. It even has an HD video camera and video editing now.

Yet people still get its name wrong. So let me explain it for you in a nice, simple way. There are even pictures to help you out.

iPod TouchiPod Touch

This is a cool Apple device that you can use to play games, listen to music, and watch videos.

You can even use it with FaceTime and Game Center to connect to friends who have iPods or iPhones.

What you can’t do is call it the iTouch. That is not its name. Please call it the iPod Touch.

I touch.

This is a simple sentence. It’s made up of the pronoun I and the verb touch.

You can also use those words in more complex sentences like "I touch the base whenever I hit a home run," or "When I think about you, I touch myself."

Although on second thought, if you’re touching yourself, just keep that between you and your naughty little hands. The rest of us really don’t need to know.

Eye Touch

Stop that. What the heck is wrong with you? Why would you stick your finger in my eye?

Jeepers. You do have naughty hands, don’t you?

Seriously, dude, eye touching is completely inappropriate.

Now, enough of that. Don’t make me call Wicket. He’ll throw up on your computer.

Are we clear now? The little music/video device is an iPod Touch, not an iTouch.

I won’t be responsible for my actions if you call it an iTouch one more time. In fact, I’ll take suggestions. How should I punish people who call it the iTouch?