Every time I turn around, it seems that one of my friends has signed up for a Second Life account and is raving about it. I finally took the plunge tonight and gave birth to “Wicket Pixie” (yes, that’s my SL character’s name, you can look it up and everything). My initial impressions were… well, they weren’t all that good. I know you can create all sorts of objects in Second Life, and it’s a metaverse that has unlimited potential, but I’m not a developer and I’ve never been addicted to chat rooms of any kind (three dimensional or IRC-like). I asked a friend to help, and he introduced me to a guy who helped me…

WTF?! How the hell did I get a box on my head? When I did that, I swear I laughed (in the real world) for five minutes straight. Is this what landed Linden Labs on the front cover of BusinessWeek magazine? It’s so far ahead of the curve. I decided to fly around the metaverse to see what was happening – and apparently there’s a lot of sex happening in Second Life. Wow. Hot avatar on avatar action! Time to make “Wicket Pixie” look a little more like me and…

Jebus Christ – how the f*ck did I end up with a beer bottle sticking out of my ear!? I don’t get it. I just don’t freakin’ get it, man. I know Second Life is supposed to be cool and awesome and amazing and unbelievable and futuristic and what-have-you – but I just don’t get it. Sorry, I must be stupid. I’m not afraid to try new things, but I think I’ve gotta wait for this thing to bake a little longer and get a bit easier to use before I spend every waking moment inside a second life I have no time for.

Second Life: I Don’t Get It