“When in the Course of human events, it becomes necessary for one people to dissolve the political bands which have connected them with another, and to assume among the Powers of the earth, the separate and equal station to which the Laws of Nature and Nature’s God entitle them, a decent respect to the opinions of mankind requires that they should declare the causes which impel them to the separation.”

Dissolve? Separation? Were the Founding Fathers not too happy with the government under which they lived? Guess so, otherwise this may have been called the Declaration of Complacency.

We hold these truths to be self-evident, that all men are created equal, that they are endowed by their Creator with certain unalienable Rights, that among these are Life, Liberty and the pursuit of Happiness.

Liberty is awesome.

That to secure these rights, Governments are instituted among Men, deriving their just powers from the consent of the governed, — That whenever any Form of Government becomes destructive of these ends, it is the Right of the People to alter or to abolish it, and to institute new Government, laying its foundation on such principles and organizing its powers in such form, as to them shall seem most likely to effect their Safety and Happiness.

Abolish? Dude. That’s terrorism. Apparently, so is printing your own currency.

Democrats and Republicans are the same. They’re owners – and they most certainly don’t give a fzck about you, your life, your liberty, or enabling the pursuit of your own happiness. Wake up.

I don’t care who you vote for, just do your best to vote for someone who hasn’t taken campaign contributions from corporations – m’kay?

The United Corporation States of America