If I Ran The Zoo
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We just watched the Little People of America storm 16th with their chant: “Hell no – we won't grow!” They were followed shortly by the Bay Area League of Women Menstruators, who could be heard chanting: “Hell no – we won't flow!” Naturally, they were only copying the Crackheads of North America, who were screaming: “Hell no – we want blow!” They were joined by the Naked Old People with Alzheimer's of Marin County: “Hell, we can't remember the words but we hope they serve peach cobbler tonight!” If you think I'm being silly, you apparently haven't heard about the first known civilian death. Tell me, what did that bridge ever do to you?! Stupid people are turning this tragedy into a comedy. To protest the protesters, Gretchen and I have decided to stay home for the night. We might even liberate our underwear in a few minutes. UPDATE: Mexican Lesbians have now joined the fray. [Via BuzzMachine]
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18 Comments
Anonymous
March 20th, 2003
at 9:20pm
You two liberate that underwear! (nudge nudge wink wink say no more)
In fact, we should all liberate our underwear to protest the protesters!
Anonymous
March 20th, 2003
at 9:22pm
salute your shorts.
Anonymous
March 20th, 2003
at 9:31pm
PLEASE turn off the webcam. hehe
Anonymous
March 20th, 2003
at 9:41pm
Are you sure we want Chris to turn off the webcam? Wait a minute… nevermind. We're sure…
Anonymous
March 20th, 2003
at 10:03pm
So when will gnomes be drafted into the ULA (underwear liberation Army)??
Anonymous
March 20th, 2003
at 10:19pm
I walked by this anti-war protest today. It was…interesting. Some girl had a sign that read, “Draft beer, not people.” I'm not quite sure how to react to that. I personally thought she was a moron. It was a little TOO college-y of a statement to march around with on a stick. Also, I heard that there is no draft anymore. Maybe I'm wrong, but I think she is.
Again, I know I sort of want to talk about all that's going on in the world, but I don't feel like it's my place. Yes, I know that we all have the right to say how we feel, to speak our minds, but I feel that if you don't know all the facts, then you should keep your mouth shut about it. I mean, it just seems that people are preaching that war is bad, but are talking more generally. Everyone knows that war is bad. No one LOVES war, but we have to look at the circumstances involved, don't we? I just don't know how many people are doing that.
It seems like some people are just being silly. In Boston this morning, this man and woman (along with a few others) were blocking the entrance to some financial building while the people who worked there were trying to get in to their jobs. There was a clip on the news of this man trying to get past these people, but they all just sat there blocking his way. When the news crew came up and asked the man and his wife what they were doing and why, the couple replied that they were so proud that they were executing their rights to stand up for what they believe in. They said that they were deliberately “inconveniencing” these people going to work to illustrate how “inconvenient” war is. Okay, I feel that I don't have to know all the details of the world and politics to say that this is fucking ridiculous. This dude is trying to get to work while these morons are being Inconvenience Personified? I'm telling you, if I were trying to get to work, I would have walked right over these people…would've stepped on them if I had to. They were not accomplishing a goddamn thing, if you ask me.
Anyway, I digressed a bit. My point was that even though I don't know enough to make any quotable statements about what I think the world should be doing (and even if I did know enough, I still don't think it'd be appropriate to act like I know what's best for the world), I still think that it's appropriate to address OTHER people's opinions. I do not take any responsibility for these opinions, and I won't say that I necessarily share them, but I found them to be thought-provoking. Any time I hear a statement either for or against the war, I think it's worth noting because I think there is nothing wrong with supplying people with something more to think about. Well, I'm not supplying these thoughts, I'm just showing you a few things that were shown to me…
Anonymous
March 20th, 2003
at 10:27pm
I was going to liberate my underwear but forgot after that last post.
Anonymous
March 20th, 2003
at 10:46pm
I fixed the hair on your logo. It's at my link.
Anonymous
March 20th, 2003
at 11:38pm
I think the draft still exists, but it won't be used unless absolutely necessary. The difference between the old days and today is that we have a huge reserve and active corps, plus a deadly special forces team. Such a huge amount of manpower defeats the need of a draft. Doesn't mean that all adult males still have to sign up for a Selective Service number.
Anonymous
March 20th, 2003
at 11:43pm
Man, Lori. What a story!!!
Anonymous
March 21st, 2003
at 1:52am
I have scored two tickets for Celine Dion's show in LV. My idea is to toss my white underwear as she comes out on stage!
Anonymous
March 21st, 2003
at 4:04am
Netpanday, sweet idea! Nice little show intro for her…
Anonymous
March 21st, 2003
at 5:46am
If you're going to liberate your underwear, you probably should go ahead and do the whole John and Yoko thing.
You know, the interview in bed, the billboard…
Anonymous
March 21st, 2003
at 7:51am
hey I liberate my underwear nightly I am so patriotic dang it!!!
Anonymous
March 21st, 2003
at 8:00am
Ohhh, Gnome-Girl liberates her underwear nightly! Can I *slap*…
Never mess with a Gnome-Girl.
Chris I apologize for saying that your haircut makes you look like a chia-pet. That was an insult to chia-pets. :)
Get well! That's an order!
Anonymous
March 21st, 2003
at 10:45am
Hey “Stone Cold” Pirillo, I think you should start a movement of the underwear liberation to be fought on US soil. If you start, you have loyal drones that will follow. Hell, why not have a “hair and underwear liberation” since we both liberated our hair. :)
Anonymous
March 21st, 2003
at 11:34am
I was cycling to work across the bridge and was stopped by a bridge patrol. The guy had just climbed over the railing. I happened to have a disposable camera with me so I took photos. He was calm and speaking out against the war and the killing of innocent people.
More police showed up and moved us back. I assumed he would simply finish his protest and then get hauled off.
But he decided to jump after giving his statement to the media.
Anonymous
March 22nd, 2003
at 11:50am
Why is there a U.S. Consulate in Acapulco? Really? Why?