We have new snail mail addresses – par for the course. Let’s start with changing our American Express account…

Our System is Not Responding. You may experience intermittent delays. We apologize for this inconvenience. While we are working to correct the problem, you can: Try again by hitting the Back, Refresh or Reload buttons on your web browser; Try your request again later today. If you are trying to make a payment, you can pay via telephone by calling 1-800-472-9297. Thank you.

Crap. Okay, let’s just move on to Comcast…

Comcast is currently upgrading its systems. As a result, the feature you have requested is temporarily unavailable. Our Customer Service Representatives have no additional information at this time. They will not be able to assist you with this matter during the upgrade. We apologize for the inconvenience. Please check back shortly. Thank you for your patience.

Oh, jeez.