Have you ever felt envious of your hacker friends? While they’re off making their fortunes, you’re watching The Matrix for the millionth time dreaming of a day when you can use your code to unlock the secrets of the world. Well, I can’t tell you how to become a master hacker. I can, however, give you three tips that will help you fake being a hacker… [$5+ patrons can read the rest of How to Fake Being a Hacker here. Not a patron? Consider the benefits here!]
Ryan Bouley must have never heard me talk before on a vlog or live stream! ;-) What type of music do you listen to? What are some of your favorite bands or artists? I will likely have to answer this question every single week for the rest of my life, won’t I? Suggestion: watch the vlogs. You’ll hear me singing or humming or whistling tunes that are going through my mind at the time. That’s the answer forevermore.
Patron John Whittaker is curious about moments in time. You, too, can become a Patron and receive priority answers to your questions! If you could free time for one hour, what sort of mischief would you get up to? Also, if you could freeze an hour or day of time from your past, at what point would you freeze it – and why? I’m going to sound like a fuddy-duddy, but I’d freeze time right now and give me an extra hour to get work done. No, seriously – I’m tired, and it’s 11:24pm on a Sunday evening. I’m pushing through answering questions. Am I getting old?! If I were to freeze an hour in my past, it’d probably be one of the first times I was ever in Hawaii – but not for reasons I’d care to get into right now. What about everyone else? Where would you freeze time from your past, and what would you do if you could freeze time right now for an hour?
Patron Johannes is curious about famous people! You, too, can become a Patron and receive priority answers to your questions! Who is the most famous person you have met/seen/talked to? I’ve actually been fortunate to meet several. However, I’d have to say “Weird Al” Yankovic – only because he truly remembers me, and that makes all the difference! What about all of you? Have you met anyone famous? If so… who was it, and how did you meet?
Patron Ryan Reeves must be a craft beer fan! You, too, can become a Patron and receive priority answers to your questions! Have you been to any of your local craft breweries? And if so, which one had the best brews? I haven’t, really – I’m not an “expert” beer drinker. I know what I enjoy – and when given a targeted opportunity, I’ll explore. It was at a local brewhouse that I first discovered that a porter fits my flavor profile best. Most non-milky stouts make me twice as happy. What about all of you out there? Are you a fan of craft beers? Have you toured any local breweries?
Aaron Michael Solomon is apparently anxious for the new Star Wars movie! If you were making your star wars movie/series, who would you cast and who would be your executive director of the movie/series and why? I’d cast complete unknowns. As such, I don’t know who they’d be. I don’t know who I’d choose for an executive director, either – since film is not quite my area of expertise. I could pull a favorite name out of a hat, but that may not help. As you already know, I’m VERY happy that original actors will be in the movie! It just… wouldn’t be right without them. You know? Who would YOU cast in the new Star Wars movie?
Patron Steven Palmer must be a Simpsons fan! You, too, can become a Patron and receive priority answers to your questions! What’s your favourite Simpsons moment of all time? It’s difficult to pick just one moment, but it’d certainly be from the early era that I experienced when I was in college. Friends and I would often find ourselves latching onto catchphrases and non-sensical dialogue. What about all of YOU? What’s been your favorite moment on this iconic show – EVER? Share it with us in the comments!
Patron Veronica Cruz is trying to give me heart failure! You, too, can become a Patron and receive priority answers to your questions! What would you do if you had to get rid of all of your Vaders? First, I’d have heart failure. And then I’d probably curl up in a corner somewhere and cry while rocking back and forth. And then…. I’d probably find something else to collect. It’s always been a part of my DNA, I think – the inherent need to assemble and organize. So, even if my array of Darth Vader memorabilia weren’t surrounding me, it’d probably be something else at this stage in life (even though, you might know, the Vader collection didn’t even begin until 2004). My collection, mind you, is far from complete – but it’s a thematic comfort that makes life a bit more interesting for me. You can see much of the collection here:
TehWinnerCat asked me: Why are so many people fascinated with Minecraft? Having used computers since the ’80s, I love modern graphic capabilities, so I just don’t get it. Minecraft is not about graphics processing prowess; it’s about the freedom to construct. Even I didn’t understand what the whole Minecraft thing was about when I first saw it — if only because I was caught up in the platform of choice (Java, which is disgusting on the desktop). I got it, but I didn’t get it — because it wasn’t for me. I don’t feel the need to create virtual spaces. I never got into Second Life, either — and, believe me, SL was less usable than MC. Two different environments, mind you, but equal in their power to unleash creative potential from within. I’m old school in the sense that I like (and appreciate) playing with physical structures… like LEGO bricks. And Minecraft, in many ways (not every way), is a virtual version of the plastic LEGO ecosystem.
Craig Chamberlin (The Tech Teacher) asked: What role would you play if you were cast for a part in Game of Thrones? Fun question, Craig! I’d want to play the role of a person who doesn’t get killed. So, nobody. Wait! No, I’d be cast as a vision in Daenerys’s dream. That way, I couldn’t die – and the Mother of Dragons would forever be intertwined with my existence. I win. What type of character would YOU play?
Scott Finkelstein asked: If you could spend a day at any location in the Star Wars universe (i.e. Hoth, Cantina, Death Star), where would you choose to spend it? Coruscant. A planet that’s all-city? Sounds better than a space station that gets blown up. For those who don’t know much about Coruscant: It was generally agreed that Coruscant was, during most of galactic history, the most politically important world in the galaxy. At various times, it was the capital of the Galactic Republic, the Galactic Empire, the New Republic, the Yuuzhan Vong empire, the Galactic Alliance, very briefly the Fel Empire, Darth Krayt’s Galactic Empire, and the Galactic Federation Triumvirate. In controlling Coruscant, these governments controlled most of the galaxy in the process.
Louise Izzabelle asked: If you were taken to a remote island, what four gadgets would you take with you? A transponder, a 1,000,000,000 lumens searchlight, a universal translator, and a TARDIS. I don’t want to be on a remote island for long. How well do you think *I* would last in an environment like that? HELLO! There would likely be no Internet connection and no electric outlets. It’s safe to say that I would break out in hives long before the first day ended. Let’s not even discuss sleeping on the ground outside where things are creeping and crawling. Yeah… please God no. It doesn’t usually work too well for me when The Great Indoorsman goes OUTdoors.
Christopher Bryan Lencioni dared to ask: On your videos and vlogs, you have done some crazy things for viewers. What would you say is the craziest thing you have done on your videos/vlogs? HELLO! You must not have been around for long, eh? I’ve been known to do a lot of crazy things on video, but the best (worst?!) always tend to happen during a “Subservient Chris” broadcast. People donate money to whatever cause I’m raising money for and request me to do odd things. I’ve had dogs licking peanut butter off of my face and had to dress in a…. well, take a look for yourself. This has to be the best (again – worst?!). The video where Diana did my makeup is a VERY close second!
Andrew Anthony Cristiano writes: If you could ask your future self one question, what would it be? How did you get here? No, seriously. That’s what I’d ask myself. I’d want to know everything; what did I do along the way? What choices did I make? Which mistakes did I learn from? I think that the simple “how did you get here” would encompass all of these things! What would you ask your future self?
Cathy asked me: If you could have any five personalities over for dinner — living or dead, fictional or not — who would they be and why? Interesting question! I had to think about this one a bit. I admit that my answers to this probably change on a regular basis. For now, though: Neil DeGrasse Tyson — because it’s him. Ole Kirk Christiansen — because it’s him. Dave Prowse — because it’s him. You — because you’re reading this. Indiana Jones — because it’s him. Who would you have over to dinner, and why?