2005 July 21

Look, folks – I’m enjoying Beauty and the Geek (just like the rest of you), but I am not like Richard in any way. Two people have made this innocent juxtaposition, but it’s just flat-out wrong. He’s the lanky guy who has no social skills. First, I’m not lanky – I was husky in junior high. And while I enjoy Richard’s over-the-top mannerisms, I have a completely different style. Richard has never kissed a girl, and I nailed my first smooch in the second grade. My ears also don’t stick out half as far. I may be a geek, but I guess I’m not a total geek. The guys on this show are closer to nerds, IMHO. And these beauties are truly beauties, but I’ve known much better beauties who also happen to have brains (present company included). Beauty and the Geek hits too close to home.

Read more on Become a Beauty and The Geek Contestant!…

Mark calls in to ask about the AMD Dual Core X2 processor? He’s thinking about upgrading his PC and wants to know if it’s time to upgrade or would it be better to wait for Longhorn? Will this processor be Longhorn compatible? Is it better than Intel Dual Core? Is the performance enough better than Mark’s existing AMD processor? Chris enlists x64 Dual Core expert Ryan Hoffman from Extended64.com to tackle Marks questions. If you’re thinking of upgrading your system to a 64-bit processor, this could be an important 5 minutes.

Read more on Is It Time to Upgrade to AMD Dual Core Processor?…

The verdict is in: Burton's interpretation of Charlie and the Chocolate Factory is a winner. Ponzi disagrees. I felt this film was much more true to Dahl's original story, and infinitely more complete (with backstory and epilogue). Since I'm a huge Elfman fan, I really appreciated the updated score / Oompa Loompa songs. I'm not convinced that Depp was the better Wonka, however – Gene Wilder nailed that character with a much more adorable madness. Sadly, no Vermicious Knids or Snozzberries were to be found this time around – but it's much less campy, a lot more dark, and overall a much better movie. If Roald Dahl were still alive, I'd expect much more projects to come from he and the Burton / Elfman duo. They were all cut from the same cloth, it seems. I can't wait for this one to come out on high definition DVD. All we need now is a new Family Guy episode. My number one complaint: not being able to eat a Wonka bar during the show. Sure, they had plenty in stock – but they're hydrogenated. There's always the sequel!

Read more on Willy Wonka, Willy Wonka!…

Nothing zaps afternoon productivity quicker than a power outage. Not just a power surge, mind you – but an all-out power outage. Wattage droppage. At first, I thought it was because I was running too many things at once – the blender, the microwave, my teleporter, etc. Suckin' up da juice, yo! I ran downstairs through the spider-infested garage and flipped every breaker in the fuse box. Nothing happened; our UPSs kept beeping, and the ROUSSes were inching closer. I figured it was a neighborhood thing when I called the power company. Bah! Our entire block was out of juice (though we were the first to report it), and the lines wouldn't be fixed until 6AM the next morning. No power all night long makes for… a metric ton of wasted refrigerated items.
“Time not important, only food important.”

Read more on Power Generator Blues…

They say the real estate market is about to burst – or is housing about to bust? Well, we're officially house hunting – and boy, are there a lot of house species in the wild. You have your classic Fixerus Uppicus, which needs a lot more than TLC. There's the wily Bungali Crampi, or the houses that tend to be too small for home office needs. The real estate wild doesn't end there, though! We have the Eightia Stuckia, or the house that is blatantly frozen in time with tons of gold trim. My favorite is the Toodamnexpensivus Fortherestofus, natch. Oh, the joys of finding a house to own – the real estate market in Seattle is challenging.

Read more on Seattle Real Estate…

This Week In Games – TWIG – is a weekly podcast. In every episode I’ll give you the lowdown on what’s going on in the industry, and tack along my personal opinions.

Read more on This Week in Games – July 21, 2005…