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2004 February

She Bangs BitTorrent and RSS

I heart BitTorrent. It's a poor man's TiVo! In a single day, I was able to catch up on my Scrubs and Simpsons seasons. Frasier, Friends… they're all here. That, combined with RSS, makes for a wonderful broadband experience. Props to rayg for helping feed my new addiction. Now I can stay abreast of all of William Hung's appearances. Here's to hoping they give him a card in an upcoming GPK release. FWIW, Topps just announced an all-new 2nd series the other day. Too bad they don't have an RSS feed, eh?

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Superhero Cinema

Spider-Man didn't impress me much. DareDevil seemed too short. The only super thing in Superman III was the computer at the end of the movie. X2 was almost close to okay. I haven't seen LXG yet – and we'll see how wellPunisher fares. I didn't have much hope for Hulk, but… it's about the only one I've been impressed with so far. We found a used 2-DVD set for $10 at Blockbuster the other day – and the package is definitely worth twice that amount. The cinematography is fantastic, the special effects are realistic, and the story is well balanced. Give it a spin if you haven't already. I hear the game is just as good, too.

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James K. Polk?

In 1844, the Democrats were split. The three nominees for the presidential candidate were Martin Van Buren, a former president and an abolitionist; James Buchanan, a moderate; Louis Cass, a general and expansionist. From D.C. came a dark horse riding up: he was Ralph Nader, Independent of the Stump.

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Worst Game Ever

I was doing research for Lockergnome's new channel, Game Invasion, when I stumbled upon Taleban Attack. I… don't know what to say. The page was written in Italian, but according to a rough translation: “Totally in 3D, it is divided in 2 distinguished parts: from the part of the talebani and from the part of the Americans.” Wow. This is a nightmare come true.

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Stuck with a PIN

“Ah, yes. I had had the same brain system failure that Chris described – staring at the ATM and just not remembering that PIN! So now I write the PIN number on the back of each card, in the signature box. WAIT! No, I don't write the actual PIN. I use one 'formula' for all cards. For example, a formula could be to add 3333 to the actual numbers of your PIN. The new TOTAL is then written on the card. If this was your formula, you only have to subtract 3333 from the PIN written on the back of any card, and you will have the actual PIN for that card. Now, does anybody remember where I left my wallet?” (A. John Gallant)

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NCLAUNCH

I was checking for the unwelcome, Acrobat-launched WISPTIS.EXE when I spied something strange. At some point during the past day, 'NCLAUNCH.EXe' had found its way into my Windows directory and was running ever-so-silently in the background. What's worse, I found it via MSCONFIG set to autolaunch on startup. Not knowing where this process came from, I killed it immediately and searched for clues online. Alas, there were no helpful sites to be found. Diving into the Properties for the file, I found the answer in Comments field on the Version tab to be quite informative: “File launcher used by SWF Studio screensavers on Windows NT, 2000 and XP.” Turns out this was a remnant of some lousy-ass eye candy I tried (and immediately uninstalled) yesterday. Consider yourself informed and forewarned.

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Lady and the Tramp

Disneyland was quite a spot for Valentine's Day lovers on Saturday. I must say, however, that California Adventure was… about as exciting as Nebraska. We didn't get to ride the only ride worth riding because the line was too long – and the line for “gourmet” coffee was even longer. Still, I had a great time with my sweetheart. Jack Skellington memorabilia was all around (thanks to the Haunted Mansion redux), so I had to empty my wallet before leaving. $80 of it went to two jackets that would help keep our underdressed bodies warm in the evening hours. And since LEGO had an Imagination Center in Downtown Disney, I was also able to get a Darth Vader figurine to aid in the completion of my freshly-formed (out of the package) collection. Next year, perhaps I'll pick a slightly more secluded place to share time with that certain someone?

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Gnomedex 4 Officially Announced

They said Lockergnome couldn't do it again. However, we still went ahead and booked a casino in Lake Tahoe from September 30th to October 3rd for the fourth-annual Gnomedex tech conference. This time around, we set up a THREE DAY OPEN BAR – and pre-registration is still $99! How much alcohol can you down in 72 hours? Let's not forget about the whole “technology” thing, either. We'll still have plenty of information for you to download into your soaked little skull. That, and like every respectable host, we won't start activities at the butt crack of dawn. Details will continue to roll in, but I can already see that we'll (ONCE AGAIN) give other conventions a run for their money (and value).

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New Cleaning Tool Available

After years of suffering from the dust that slips behind my monitor's bezel, I finally discovered a way to clean the other side of my screen. WARNING: this internal scrubber is not work safe. If you'd like to give the thing a whirl, I will not be held responsible for any subsequent damage. Janet Jackson has already pre-apologized for having nothing to do with it.

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Three-Day Open Bar

Okay, here's what I've been authorized to tell you about Gnomedex 4: we're gonna have a three-day open bar for all attendees. More details to be revealed on Thursday, but really… what else do you want to know?

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A Truly Civil War

As many of you have already noted, I had quite an adventure this weekend. We had a total blast being in Eric Myszka's artillery battery. If you've never fired a cannon before, I recommend you try it some time. This re-enactment thing isn't something I'm ready to do on a monthly basis, but I'll be dragging Jason and Veronica's dad with me to the April event. I'll post digital footage as soon as it's been compiled and encoded.

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Calling All Gamers

We're prepping to launch a gaming newsletter for Lockergnome, and man… I think I'm in trouble. I've been looking at all sorts of digial diversions for Windows, Palm OS, Linux, OS X, etc. Neverball is one of those definite keepers. Is it going to be a commercial success like The Simpsons: Hit & Run (another one on my daily play list)? Probably not, but that doesn't make it any less entertaining. Even Janet is giving it two boobies up!

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Shock and Bra

Wow. You'd think that the world had never seen a naked titty before? Everyone's up in arms over the nipple flashing we received on Super Bowl Sunday (courtesy of Janet Jackson and Justin Timberlake). I'm just as disappointed as the rest of you. I ask, why didn't we get to see the other one?! Is her left breasticle so hideously deformed that it wasn't allowed to be shown in public? Despite efforts of the Puritan kind, people are having sex every minute of every hour of every day. Not the same people, mind you – but humans, nonetheless. As pre-pubescent, we dreamed of squeezing McGuffies 'til the cows came home. But now – oh the HORROR – we see one honker out of millions and there's something wrong with the moral fabric of society. It's just a friggin' hooter, folks. If you honestly weren't expecting anything weird to happen at a violent sporting event tipped to the gills with alcohol, you've got another mammary coming.

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