2003 August

Technorati isn't just for egosurfing. This morning, it pulled in dozens of entries for my keywords from a single source: AsamBoi. Now, if you click that link before Blogger support gets to it, you'll see that someone's mirrored my ENTIRE blog. Without RSS, I probably would have never known about or reported this infraction. I also wouldn't have discovered that Gnomedex is one of the world's most valuable tech conferences (according to Werner Vogels) without Feedster. And through serendipity, I stumbled upon Waypath. Still think news aggregators are only for early adopters? Think again.

Read more on Really Super Sleuthing…

A man and his wife were having an argument about who should make the coffee each morning. The wife said, “You should do it, because you get up first, and then we don't have to wait as long to get our coffee.” The husband said, “You are in charge of the cooking around here and you should do it, because that's your job, and I can just wait for my coffee.” Wife replies, “No, you should do it – and the Bible says that the man should brew the coffee.” Husband replies, ” I can't believe that, show me.” So she fetched the Good Book, and showed him at the top of several pages, that it (indeed) says: “HEBREWS.”

Read more on Honor Thy Frother…

Consider this my Cheyenne-styled stunt for the day: “I met you before the fall of Rome. And I begged you to let me take you home. You were wrong, I was right. You said goodbye, I said goodnight.” Those of you with sharper craniums will be able to pick up on the not-so-subtle allusion. I have to play word games for the time being, because many of you couldn't handle the truth directly if I shared it today. Perhaps in two weeks, I'll be able to explain more. It has nothing to do with a specific person, either. Good news. Very good news.

Read more on It's All Been Done…

Myszka thought it would be cute to steal a photo from one of my boxes and put it on eBay. The scary part is: bidding is already up to $10.50. “One of a kind – comes with a nice white border and will be mailed out with special care. Willing to throw in two Lockergnome bumper stickers as well.” If this works, I'm gonna give him other crap from my closet.

Read more on Almost Famous…

I am in command. This is not a sexual torture device in which I rest my buttocks; it is a very comfortable Synchron (albeit an older model). Three years ago, I purchased it after noticing my posture was piss poor in a so-called executive chair. Those padded seats may look cool, but they're really bad for your back and neck. This week, my spine returned to salvation. Price? You don't wanna know. You'd have to support Jason a thousand times over to pay for the privilege of ownership. Still, it comes with my wholehearted recommendation.

Read more on The Captain's Chair…

Okay, if you had to choose a governor for YOUR state (or province), who would it be? Arnold or Arnold? I don't know if I'd want Mary in office, but only because she has a Members Entrance… as well as a special place on her Web site for paying visitors. *ahem* Since Simon couldn't take the pressure, I have no choice but to back Merlin… or Speak 'N Math. Either one would do a better job, I'm certain. Hey, what ever happened to that Bill on Capitol Hill? He's doing Mervyn's commercials. I smell a comeback. And a really rotten race. Let's just elect Randy “Macho Man / Slim Jim” Savage and be done with it. Instead of caucuses, we could have Battle Royales. That's a funny word: caucus. It makes me laugh long time.

Read more on WWJD?…

Apparently, Garbage Pail Kids can be found at Target. Lucky me; I live within a five-mile radius of two stores. Can anybody confirm that these stickers are out on the market today? If I can find a non-sports cards shop nearby soon, I'll swing in and secure a complete set for my collection. I haven't seen anything about prices yet, either (which has me slightly worried). Maybe it's time to go exploring? Not until after my soccer game with Drew Carey.

Read more on GPK Sightings…

So, I just logged into my Postini account and deleted another 400 virus-laden messages. This, of course, is after deleting 600 at 1PM this afternoon – and 500 at 9AM. I've had thousands of false error reports to contend with, too. Here's what concerns me most about this situation: having my address added to newsletters and discussion lists without confirmation. This isn't just a problem for Windows users anymore. I'm starting to feel like George Jetson on a treadmill. It makes me wanna staple bagels to my face… then let out a big belch on the radio.

Read more on SoBigger Aftermath…

Apphole – attorney who sends cease and desist letters to tech rumor blogs.
Blahg – digital diary that nobody but the author cares about.
Boingy – totally geeky.
Decantered – having your entire entry lifted and posted to another's blog.
Googlephant – person who only uses one search engine for everything.
Gnome-Girl – yo g dawg it is write in fornt of your face.
Menannite – an individual who has a crush on female CSS masters.
Moblog – online journal about the chief Stooge.
Overjoid – getting really excited to have lunch with somebody important.
Perkinsons – disease with a payload of clueless behavior that's always on-line.
RSS – Really Something Silly.
SCOBOL – programming language that only works with Microsoft operating systems.
Technoratee – information whore.
Weinburger – a link sandwich.
Winerd – power user who has the ability to piss off the entire Internet in three sentences or less.

Read more on The Blogger's Dictionary (Volume I)…

bitch-slap – deliver a stinging blow to (someone), typically in order to humiliate them: “I would have bitch-slapped him for talking that way.” blamestorming – discussion regarding the assigning of responsibility for a failure or mistake. blonde moment – an instance of being silly or scatterbrained. bootylicious – sexually attractive. brochureware – web sites or web pages produced by converting a company's printed marketing or advertising material into an Internet format, typically providing little or no opportunity for interactive contact with prospective customers. And you can read the entire list here (PDF).

Read more on Oxford Rocks…

I have no dial tone on my regular phone line, but the DSL connection still works. Perhaps it's time I stop lurking in Broadband Reports and sign up for an account already? I can't find a better online resource for ISP quandaries. I've been working with CableNut to get my MTU / RWIN / etc. in line; these settings can be tricky. Since my wireless router is still up north, I picked up a BEFSX41 yesterday. I'll optimize this connection sooner or later. Time for coffee.

Read more on Phone Home…

Here's an update on the DSL brouhaha. Now, it seems SBC has crossed my number with somebody else's. I've been getting wrong numbers right and left, and strange messages about picking up poker tables and missing doctor's appointments on my digital answering machine. WTF?!

Read more on Out of the Frying Pan…

If you were thinking about getting DSL through SBC Yahoo, don't – they're morons over there. Seriously, avoid them like the plague. Even though I paid for an account to be set up on Saturday, August 9th, 2003 at 3:44 PM CDT, opted for a self-installation, and received the modem 15 minutes ago, they're not going to “flip the switch” until Thursday, August 28th, 2003. Excuse me?! That's beyond asinine, and believe YOU me – I'm fighting that date every step of the way. Some would say: “Why not go with a cable modem?” Call it a lack of confidence in that network infrastructure. Not to say that PacBell is any better, but at least I'm in better control of my bandwidth.

Read more on I Hate SBC Yahoo Already…

In between dodging dozens of these damned Sobig bounces every other minute, both Scott and I have announced that we're working on a tutorial for RSS. It's just “too damn confusing” for the average person to welcome onto their desktop, so we're aiming to demystify the funkadelic Malkovich flavor of super simple syndication. I know that Nick is already refining a better feature set for FeedDemon 2.0, and I'm hoping that Greg will start listening to my incessant feedback for improving NewsGator (my current choice for a news aggregator). When all is said and done, we want to make this stuff easier for Joe and Judy Consumer to understand.

Read more on RSS is Bigger Than Jesus…

R&M Studios is at it again. My favorite photographer in the whole wide world sent me another present this morning via e-mail. You have to agree, she's a fox. I've never been more proud to have my white face on someone THAT tan. Here I thought I'd need coffee to wake me up…

Read more on Better Than Caffeine…