My sideburns won't go away. No matter how hard you try, you cannot resist them. They 0wn you. You shall succumb to their will. Do not taunt my sideburns - you will lose. They are tired of people sending the JavaScript clock to them via e-mail. They have faced the threat of a thousand electric razors and have walked away unscathed every time. My sideburns are the ultimate power in the universe. They are hotter than a Vulcan in the height of pon farr. You will love them. You must love them. All your attention are belong to them.

I work in several primary schools, and needed a way to stop kids from installing Messenger on all the Lab PC's. We don't have 2K/XP everywhere (yet), so group policy wouldn't help me, and I don't like locking the pc's down 100%, since I like giving the kids a little bit of freedom in exploring the computers. MSN Messenger has a small flaw when installing: it doesn't ask you *where* to install it. Simply create two files, called 'Messenger' and 'MSNMessenger' (no extension) in the Program Files folder.

Set the attributes for these files to read only, and hidden. Then, just make sure the system is set not to 'show all files' (a good safety
precaution anyway, for computer novices). When someone tries to install Messenger, it will happily complete the installation process, yet it won't be installed! It just vanishes! Yes, it's not a perfect solution. Anyone with a clue would check, and delete those hidden files. But it definitly will slow them down. I've done this trick for over a year in 6 Primary schools, filled with pretty smart kids, and nobody has figured it out yet! [Rohan Beckett]

“ItÂ’s been discovered that embedded URLs in spoofed multimedia files (such as .MP3 and .WAV) can be used to “hijackÂâ€? users to malicious web sites. Web sites can be automatically opened when users click on MP3 or WAV files. A hacker can use file extension spoofing in order to trick users to open these files; for example, an .MP3 file may really be another file type, such as a .AFX file, which may contain a URL. Internet applications (browser, e-mail client, etc.) may even open such files without asking the user what to do (if the user made a decision in the past to automatically open the specific file extension).”

“The CompactFlash Association (CFA) announced today that
semiconductors used in electronic systems, including CompactFlash and CF I/O cards, would be
irreparably damaged if subjected to the irradiation process that was being used by the U.S. Postal
Service (USPS) to sanitize the mail. Such damage will not only cause loss of data stored on the cards,
but the cards will no longer be operable. Testing has confirmed that these systems, which operate in the range of 55 kGy, damage
not only semiconductors, but other goods as well, including pharmaceuticals, contact lenses, biological
samples, and photographic film.”

I have been thinking along these lines. And I will do a blog or two. Despite the fact that I seem critical of this phenomenon, I am, in fact, supportive. It's just the nutty aspects that annoy me. Also there is a belief that these people are pioneers. I have one more column coming up where I take some of these pioneering notions to task as well as some other over-used commonplaces. And, yes, this is something of an attention-getting exercise. Somebody has to do it.

Ryan sent me the link to Dvorak's comment, and it's important for everyone to note. Part of the fun in life is challenging our beliefs. Don't tell that to the Catholic church, though.

Hey, I'd like to remind everybody that Ev will be on Call for Help this afternoon. Get those TiVos ready. Plus, Cat tells me that she's going to be featuring The Red Kitchen in her segment. She baked a banana creme pie from one of the posted recipes. I'll have screen shots later on this evening.

Okay, so I lied. I actually did have the opportunity to sit down with both Ben and Mena not long after their appearance on TechTV this evening. Here's exactly what happened - verbatim.

So, Ben… Mena… do you think that Blogger.com is the end-all, be-all blogging service? I see. And what about that Dave Winer guy - does he really smell like egg salad in person? Okay, that's what I thought. Just wanted to confirm it. Ya know, responsible journalism and all. Hey, were you two using John C. Dvorak as your mouthpiece to turn the blogging industry on its ear? Really? Okay, because I could have sworn there was a little “Mena” in that article of his. Well, if you say so. Did you ever consider naming “Movable Type” something a bit more… exciting? Oh. Have you ever seen “Call for Help” before? Jeez, no need to get violent about it. Calm down, Ben. I was just asking a simple question. You're gonna throw your neck out if you keep that up.

Now, it's a well known fact that these two characters also like to invent dance moves in their spare time. Yes, and I just so happened to catch them in the act of doing the newly-created “Blogger Trott.” [222k] I couldn't capture any audio, but Ben was basically saying “Meep meep meep meep…” while Mena was off on an “Obb obb obb obb…” tangent. She said it would have been better had she brought her spoons. If this whole software programming thing doesn't take off, they've got a real future in entertainment. Mark my words.

(Lisa, Hot Springs, Arkansas) “PLEASE DO NOT GET A MULLET! No matter what the poll says! Keep your hair the way it is! Your hair is what makes you you! Ok, thanks bye!” [You have restored my faith in humanity.]

(Bobby, Queens, New York) “I love your show and love when you fill in as a host on The Screen Savers. I have a question that has been bothering me for a while. I wanted to know if there was any way i could change my video card on my laptop.” [This, to my knowledge, is impossible for most laptops. I'm just as frustrated with the limitation.]

(Carol) “I am looking into getting into WebMastering and I was wondering if you could tell me where I can find the most up to date information on this subject.” [Oh, if only someone would make a Webmaster newsletter worth receiving.]

(Jo Ann, Ville Platte, Louisiana) “I watch your program every day. I also subscribe to your newsletters. When I receive the newsletters, sometimes I click the link to the specific shownotes for that day. When I download the page, there is usually a rather large advertisement that blocks a good bit of the page. How do I either move the ad or eliminate it so I can read all that page?” [For window pop-ups, use AnalgoX's Pow. For Flash animations, use Flashswitch.]

(Chris, Asheville, North Caronlina) “Way before TechTV, weren't you an expert in the Irish seaweed industry? I seem to recall that you hosted a how-to television show about harvesting
seaweed called 'Haul for Kelp,' and you were the director of a seaweed museum call the 'Hall for Kelp.'” [That was actually my evil twin, Edwardo.]

Okay, I'm the unluckiest person on the planet right now. I had the opportunity to meet the Movable Typers face-to-face, and I got pulled into a pitch meeting at the last minute. Well, to be truthful, the meeting was pre-scheduled - I just can't manage time very well. To make up for this scheduling oversight, I'll be screencapping the segment with my Intel cam and its video in jack - just like I do for the entire CFH show every day. Regardless, I have to give mad props to Robyn for Photoshopping my head in today's “Hair” segment. I had no idea that was you - I would have plugged your blog. And while that sounds absolutely disgusting, it's actually a very good thing. More to come. Thanks again, Robyn. I'm gonna try to get you “in there” tomorrow when we do the interview with Evan. At least, I'll tease my favorite blogs on the TechTV site. Just found my new favorite: Mike's Blog. Dude's nuts. I like that in a blogger.

I get to meet Ben and Mena tomorrow - they're going to be on TSS! I just wrote about MT in an upcoming CPU article on blogging (along with Radio, Blogger, LiveJournal, and Greymatter). I looked at it again a few minutes ago and it seemed a little too negative. Oops. Movable Type will get another blessing” in a future column. Oh, and Ev is coming on CFH this week, too! Yeah, so why hasn't he blogged that? Will he? Why not? Does Ev really exist? I mean, really? Have any of you ever seen Ev in person? Is he really as real as he makes us believe he is? Hrmph. Crap. Simpsons are on.

Gretchen and I… wait, I'm not hyperlinking to her blog because every other person on the planet knows about her - and they love her - and they visit her - and they comment on aaaaaaaall her posts - and they think she's just da bomb. Anyway, I'm not linking to her. Damnit. So much for self-control. Amazing what a man can do when his nuts are in a sling, eh? Yeah, I told her that she should put them out to cool. There's nothing quite like baked almonds. Wait. What did you think I was talking ab…? Yeah, I guess that was kind of a non-sequitur thing to do. Oh well, it's my freakin' blog.

So, anyway… Gretchen and I went out for dinner tonight. This time, we tried some random restaurant down the street. Not a good experience, although it wasn't totally bad, either. The most interesting part of the evening was when we talked about the books we read as kids. Of course, Gretchen read the whole friggin' Carroll County Public Library. I didn't get too much farther beyond “Tales of a Fourth Grade Nothing” and “Superfudge.” I just remember something about worm cookies. From the book. I had steak for dinner - which, I hope, did not have worms.

We are so hooked on Schoolhouse Rock right now. I swear, we're learning so much by listening to them. For example, did you know that Sprocket absolutely hates “The Tale of Mr. Morton?” Yes, it's true. He runs in circles and barks loudly whenever the song comes on. Wait… now he's humping the lamp. Must be “I'm Just a Bill.” Yep. I called that one, eh? This pooch is way too predictable. Hey, watch this. Oh, my bad. This isn't a very visual blog, is it? I'll shut up now.

“I was reading your column today and saw your comments in the GnomeTIP section regarding Lotus Notes… I have to admit, I used to think just like you. A few years back, I was employed as a Network Administrator for a local reinsurance company. Coming from a Microsoft consulting company, I took one look at Lotus Notes as said the same words: 'What a piece of garbage!.' It was my first time administering Lotus Notes, and as I was very used to Exchange and Outlook. However my view points were quickly changed, (right about the time the 'I Love You' virus came out). At that time, our company was not blocking file attachments, and because the AV companies took so long to get the virus patterns out, we had a few come in through our SMTP server, and nothing happened. Why?”

“Because the design of Lotus Notes circumvents any malicious activities from all the mass mailing virus at the moment, although I'm sure some sick deviant with far too much time on their hands will think of something one day. So while most of the rest of the corporate world went down (including our parent company), we remained up and running, without a hitch. As a side note, I very quickly added in ScanMail 2.x on the Lotus SMTP gate to block certain file attachments, I recommend this software if your running Notes!”

“Also the benefits of having databases right in the same application is also a great incentive. Lotus may have difficulty with certain graphic attachments in emails, but from an administrators point of view, seeing pretty pictures and fancy text is something I have no trouble giving up for the stability of Lotus Notes. [It] just does things differently, but in my opinion it is far from garbage. As a matter of fact, every time a vulnerability is exploited in Exchange or Outlook, you'll now hear me say the same about MS Mail solutions! Just my 2 cents worth though…” [Sean Soares]

“From Sharilyn (02/24/02): The majority of my Fruhead card stamps were earned in '97, the same year I moved from my comfy home in Winnipeg, Manitoba to cramped college dorm room in Welland, Ontario. My favourite line is the reference to the West End Cultural Centre, the venue Fruvous always plays in Winnipeg. It's *my* place… I've spent a lot of time volunteering and hanging out there, and it's what I missed most while I was away. As for the last 1/4 of the song… I'd LOVE to know what it means. Never had the stuff in my life!”

Normally, Windows XP Home Edition cannot join network domains, simply peer-to-peer workgroups. However, there is a fix which can solve the problem and allow WinXP Home Edition to join a domain. Microsoft wanted to cripple Windows XP Home Edition so that it could not be used on domains, which would force many to upgrade to the more expensive Windows XP Professional Edition simply to join a network domain. However, it -is- possible to get on a domain using Windows XP Home Edition.

Method 1: this can also be accomplished with the free and widely available Xteq X-Setup 6.1 by navigating to the “Network \ Auto Login \ Windows NT/2K/XP \ Settings” option within X-Setup. Simply enter the appropriate information and click “Apply Changes” - upon your next reboot, you can then join domains with WinXP Home Edition. Problem solved. X-Setup includes many other useful Windows XP tweaks / hacks / etc. for Windows XP as well, all free for personal use.

Method 2: as Serdar Yegulalp pointed out in his Win2kPowerUsers newsletter today also, this can be accomplished using Microsoft's TweakUI for Windows XP, but that has been pulled from Microsoft's Web site for the time being. I feel that it is very possible, if not highly probable, that Microsoft will prevent this
workaround from being used with future versions of TweakUI with Windows XP Home Edition, as they authored both Windows XP and TweakUI, and they don't want Windows XP Home Edition users to be able to join network domains. A copy of TweakUI for WinXP can be obtained here. [CptSiskoX]

“Tonight, my 15-year old went to Goodwill (Urbandale High School's favorite shopping place)… and he came home with a bag full of shirts and T's. He starts pulling out items of clothing and says, “You gotta see this t-shirt… it's so cool…” and he holds up one of your lockergnome.com t-shirts. I nearly died! I told him I know you and showed him your site. He says to tell you it's the coolest shirt in the world.” [Judi Eyles]

DONZ Panels. A DONZ 3-screen display system can display 3840×1024 (3.9 million) legible pixels, and a 5-screen display system can display 6400×1024 (6.5 million) legible pixels. Such high legible resolutions are impossible to achieve on any single CRT monitor. [For those who don't have everything, but want to see everything at the same time.]

Episode II Required Reading. Lucasfilm may love Star Wars geeks, but they are not being very nice to our pocketbooks. On April 23rd, a little less than two months, they are releasing almost all of the Episode II related books at once. From activity books to novelizations to reference materials, it all hits on the same day, and you probably can't afford to buy them all. [Let the Marketing push begin. Again.]

Junk e-mail scourge of cyberspace. Every time Canada's electronic-commerce watchdog signs on to his Ottawa-office e-mail, he faces a number of pressing public-policy issues, such as: “Would you like to jumpstart your desire and enhance your experience?” and “Register to win your Dream Vacation.” [Wow. I just got those same two e-mails, as well as one for Viagra. Again.]

Astin Talks Goonies 2. best part of it is the Goonies are likely to return in a forthcoming sequel says Astin. “Spielberg told me that he's almost happy with the script thatÂ’s being developed. I'm sure it will happen at some point. And all of the Goonies are interested in returning…” [It's about darn time. What else could bring Corey Feldman back from the undead?]

Adobe announces Photoshop 7. As anticipated, Adobe has announced Photoshop 7.0, a substantial upgrade to the industry-standard professional image editing that provides native on OS X support, enhanced multi-processor support and improved interoperability with other native Adobe applications. [Yes, a version is being released for Windows XP, too. Perhaps it's time I abandon my PSP roots in favor for the industry standard?]

Make the world better. If you were given a budget of a trillion US dollars, with the goal of making the world “a better place,” what would you do? [I'd buy flat panel monitors for everyone.]

Intel / Microsoft Wireless. The reference designs, based on the Microsoft® Windows® Powered Pocket PC and Smartphone 2002 software platforms and the Intel® Personal Internet Client Architecture (Intel PCA), will promote the rapid development of next-generation wireless applications and services for consumer and enterprise market segments. [Very nice, indeed. I want one. No, I want two.]

Biff to the Future. While driving to dinner last night, Ben and I had our second (yes, second) disagreement in about a month about the progression of Biffs throughout the three Back to the Future movies. [This timeline graphic is a must see. Who is the best Biff? I was always partial to the… wait, they're all one in the same, aren't they?]

Transparent Aluminium. It would appear that the Star Trek dream of transparent “allow-min'nium” (this is from a european site) is now a reality. It's not clear as crystal, but it's here. [Now, if only I could get my mouse to recognize voice commands, I'd be set. Remember how Scotty “hacked” that old Macintosh SE? That was uber cool.]

Cult of the Cluetrain. book is written by a cast of characters who were apparently caught up in the dot-com scene at its peak, and they managed to capture in one book almost all of the lunatic fringe dingbat thinking that characterized the Internet boom. [Dvorak isn't done with us yet. Not by a longshot. What will he overturn next?]